you set off my trigger... then blame my hand. [entries|friends|calendar] Ryanmarie [ website | Myspace ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

5/3/2010 [28 Apr 2009|07:27pm] when is it going to end? it's been 4 years this month. that son of a bitch destroyed me. i am not the person i used to be. i will never be that person again. i will never find happiness. i will never find love. i will never find peace. i wish it would all just go away. i wish i could erase him from my memory. but it doesnt work like that. there is NO WAY OUT. i wish that i would have died that day. i wish this amazing boy didn't save me. i wish he could see he is better than this. i wish that i could make it stop. i wish that i could cry, but i can't. i don't remember the last time i cried. it's like i'm empty. it's like i'm nothing. what happened to that beautiful girl full of laughter and life? comments??

trust in me and fall as well [16 Sep 2007|09:38pm] [ mood | drained ] I'm so sick of this. I'm so tired of trying so hard when it gets me nowhere. I don't think I can do it anymore. I can't. I'm done. my eyes hurt from crying; my heart aches from trying. my wrist burns from cutting, and in the end I still have nothing. comments??

It's like I'm not me... [07 Jun 2007|08:20pm] It's like you're a drug It's like you're a demon I can't face down It's like I'm stuck It's like I'm running from you all the time And I know I let you have all the power It's like the only company I seek is misery all around It's like you're a leech Sucking the life from me It's like I can't breathe Without you inside of me And I know I let you have all the power And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm lost It's like I'm giving up slowly It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me Leave me alone And I know these voices in my head Are mine alone And I know I'll never change my ways If I don't give you up now It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me It's like I'm not me I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can't take it Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it I'll handle it, quit it Just one more time Then that's it Just a little bit more to get me through this I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can't take it Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it I'll handle it, quit it Just one more time Then that's it Just a little bit more to get me through this It's like I can't breathe It's like I can't see anything Nothing but you I'm addicted to you It's like I can't think Without you interrupting me In my thoughts In my dreams You've taken over me It's like I'm not me comments??

... [26 Jan 2007|07:51pm] [ mood | alone ] i might as well just die. cause really, who would care? 2 comments??

I need you to survive [08 Jan 2007|11:38pm] [ mood | guilty ] Can you forgive me again? I don't know what I said But I didn't mean to hurt you I heard the words come out I felt like I would die It hurt so much to hurt you Then you look at me You're not shouting anymore You're silently broken I'd give anything now to hear those words from you Each time I say something I regret I cry "I don't want to lose you." But somehow I know that you will never leave me, yeah. 'Cause you were made for me Somehow I'll make you see How happy you make me I can't live this life Without you by my side I need you to survive So stay with me You look in my eyes and I'm screaming inside that I'm sorry. And you forgive me again You're my one true friend And I never meant to hurt you comments??

[21 Nov 2006|03:17am] I've got no place in my heart for a criminal like you to dwell, in this endeavor, make this last forever... I'm just delirious, You can't be serious, You're so infamous for leaving me a mess... comments??

Friends Only. [26 Jun 2005|10:42pm] [ mood | bored ] comments??

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